Introspective Moments

After living on Anna Maria Island for a little over two months, it is becoming clear to me that the time spent here is simply not meant to be a getaway or paradise like I assumed.  Living in a community where there aren’t many people in my age group and places open late has left me few friends.  I am someone who is used to being around many friends and people.  As social as I am, I also have an introverted side — to be a writer, I guess that is needed.

There were times in my life when “ME” time was needed to cut through crap or reflect.  My time in Florida, however long it may last, is obviously going to be one giant therapy session.  My roommate is a lovely woman of 75 and a former social worker.  This may be an odd pairing for some, but she and I get along wonderfully.

We spend much time talking about our childhood and issues. I won’t discuss these things here, but someday I hope to speak about them in some way or another.  If you’ve read any of my novels, you might be able to figure some common problematic factors in my characters that will reveal these issues.  My roommate and I cry and laugh often.

I have overcome so many things from my past throughout the years.  Now at 30, it appears God wants me to face and overcome new things I never wanted to believe about myself, the people in my life, and my past.  It’s terrifying and emotional, but a relief to let it out and move beyond it.

I try not to fear emotion or hide the pain, but I also try hard to not be a victim.  I don’t want pity.  Understanding, yes.  Love, very much so.  Pity and allowances – no.  I live a beautiful and blessed life, and am grateful for every path I’ve been down, and marvel at all the roads I have yet to travel.  I look forward to many years of education, love, experiences and epiphanies.